I'm an insurance advisor, and I'm going to tell you not to buy from people like me. At least, not for the wrong reason.
You know the scene. A cousin has just joined an insurance company. A classmate you haven't spoken to since graduation sends a long, friendly message. A tita brings it up at a family lunch, in front of everyone.
And you buy. Not because you needed it, not because you understood it, but because saying no felt worse than paying ₱3,000 a month.
I see the results of this all the time. So here's the honest version.
What goes wrong
The policy isn't built for you. It's built for the conversation. Many new advisors, through no bad intention, recommend what they've just been trained on, which may not be what fits your life.
You don't ask questions. It feels rude to interrogate family. So you don't ask what the policy covers, what the charges are, what happens if you stop paying. You find out later.
You stop paying. This is the most common ending. A policy bought out of obligation is the first one cut when money gets tight. In many products, stopping in the first few years means you get back far less than you paid in, sometimes nothing.
The relationship gets strange. If something goes wrong, a missed claim, a lapse, a misunderstanding, it's now a family problem, not a customer service problem.
What I'd want you to do instead
Separate the person from the product. You can love your cousin and still say, "I'm not ready to decide yet." That's a full sentence. It's not rejection.
Ask the same questions you'd ask a stranger. A good advisor, related or not, will be glad you asked:
- What does this policy protect me against, exactly?
- How much is paid out, and when?
- What happens if I can't pay for a few months?
- What are the charges, and what do I get back if I stop early?
- Why this product, and not something cheaper?
Take a week. A good recommendation is still a good recommendation in seven days. Pressure to sign today is a signal.
Get a second opinion. It's normal. I encourage it. If your relative's recommendation is sound, a second advisor will say so.
When buying from a relative is fine
I don't want to swing too far. Plenty of people are well served by family members who are good at this job.
It's fine when you'd have bought the same thing from a stranger. When you understood it. When you asked your questions and got clear answers. When the premium fits your budget comfortably, in a bad month, not just a good one.
The question isn't who you buy from. It's why.
If you've already bought one out of guilt
Don't panic, and don't just stop paying. That's often the most expensive option.
Get the policy out. Ask your relative, or another advisor, to walk you through what it actually does. Then decide: is it worth keeping, adjusting, or replacing? Sometimes it turns out to be a good fit after all. Sometimes it needs to change.
Either way, you'll be deciding with your eyes open, which is how the decision should have been made the first time.
The part for my fellow advisors
If you're new and selling to family: your first clients will remember how you treated them for years. Recommend what you'd recommend to a stranger. Welcome the hard questions. Let them say "not yet."
The relatives who trust you because you didn't pressure them will send you more people than the ones you guilted ever will.
